ADHD makes it harder to get things done consistently and to meet others’ expectations. This can lead to more disappointment and conflict than either person wants. If you rack up enough of these experiences, it’s easy to blame yourself when something doesn’t work out—and feel like you need to be the one to fix it. But how productive do you really need to be? And how much should other people’s opinions and preferences influence your decision? Strong self-esteem and solid relationships are a balance between generosity and assertiveness. We will discuss how ADHD inconsistencies can influence your self-esteem and others’ opinions, then discuss how to decide wisely what tasks you take on and how to negotiate any differences of opinion. And, since things don’t always go according to plan, we will talk about how to handle those occasional disappointments.